Today at La Salsa I somehow managed to order my food with the left side of my nursing tanktop pulled completely to the side, flashing the cashier the entire left cup of my bra. What? I didn't even get a discount. Sarah swears that it wasn't like that when I got out of the car but I don't know if I am really buying that. At least the UPS guy wasn't there.
In other news, please enjoy one of my latest Starbucks experiences.
Scene: Olive and I are in line at Starbucks. It is before nine in the morning so I am feeling good about making it a) out of the house so early and b) to Starbucks via feet as opposed to car. So what if I didn't get a chance to shower in the morning...not everyone showers every day you know. The line is rather long so they have taken my drink order, made it and delivered it to me before I even get up to the cashier. And my spinach feta wrap is already ready too. Wahoo!
Nice 60ish Woman in Front of Me in Line (who has been giving me smiley face since we walked in): Here let me get that for you (slides drink and wrap down counter towards register.)
Me: Thank you so much, I really appreciate it (rolls stroller packed with diaper bag, Olive and cleanup bags for Bosco towards register.)
Nice Woman: It's tough going isn't it.
Me: (Thinking that I maybe I should have showered. Do I look like that much of a mess?) Yeah, some days it's a real challenge!
NW: I am more than happy to help out someone in your situation.
Me: (My situation??) Oh right, thank you so much.
NW (to cashier): I've got that (motioning at my drink and food.)
Me: Oh my gosh, you don't have to do that.
NW: Oh no no. I was once in the same boat. (Looks pointedly at my bare ring finger and lowers voice dramatically)...my first born was born out of wedlock.
Me: (Oh sh*t. She thinks I am a single mother, that is why she is buying* my breakfast. Should I say something? *Sale has already gone through at this point.)
NW: (Possibly picking up on the torn look on my face.) Don't worry, I found me a good one and he loved my Matthew like he was his own. (Squeezes my shoulder. I repeat, squeezes my shoulder!)
Me: Thanks, that's what I am hoping for!
I'll have you know that in order to fix my karma, at a subsequent trip to Starbucks I bought the drink for the person behind me in line.
4 comments:
OMG...you have the craziest things happen to you I swear!!! I just read it twice because I had to make sure I was seeing correctly!! Do you live in a sitcom???? LOL! I think I may read it again!
hilarious. you can totally publish a book with all of these stories!
That is unreal! I had to read it to Beck - and although very well written, is difficult to act out as a one-woman show. Keep 'em coming!
That's it. You have to move out of Berkeley NOW!
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